The moral to this story

A conversation overheard at the State Fair between a certain Mama Bear and a certain Brother Bear whilst observing what had to be the world's largest swine.

Brother Bear: (urgently, panic-ly interrupting Mama Bear and Sugar Bear's conversation about "what the big piggie is doing") Mama Bear! Mama Bear!! That pig is soooo fat, its bootie is sticking out!!

Mama Bear: (trying to get a mental picture of description and failing miserably) Huh? Uh, Brother Bear, what do you mean?

Brother Bear: (speaking in excited, almost frantic terms) Mama Bear! The pig is sooo fat, the part of the body where the poop comes out is sticking out of its bootie!!!

Mama Bear: (now officially picturing the world's largest hemorrhoid attached to the world's largest swine and becoming officially intrigued) Uh. Hmm. Brother Bear, why don't we head down to the other side of this pig and take a look at what you're talking about. (because, of course, if said piggie did have a raging case of hemorrhoids, said Mama Bear felt it was her moral obligation to call PETA.)

Brother Bear: (arriving at the "business" end of things and pointing) SEE, Mama Bear? Its bootie is coming out of its bottom!

Mama Bear: (gasping. stifling the urge to concurrently scream and laugh) Oh. Well. Um, Brother Bear, that's not the pig's bottom. Um. You see. That pig there is a boy pig. Apparently a very, very, very boy pig. And what you are seeing there is (insert very biological, very technical, very calmly, very confidently stated term for piggie's very large, ahem, accoutrements). All boys have 'em, even piggies!

Brother Bear: (making a face like he was being served spinach with a side of brussel sprouts) Oh. Ew. Well, that's just disgusting don't you think, Mama Bear?

Mama Bear: (calmly weighing her options between what she wants to say and what she knows she should say) Um, no, no, not really. That's just nature, Brother Bear! You know, God made everything and that's just the way He made that piggie.

Brother Bear: Oh. Okay. Can we go ride some rides now, Mama Bear?

Mama Bear: (exhaling for the first time in several minutes) Absolutely, Brother Bear. Absolutely!

And the moral to this humorous little tail (snicker, snicker)?

Never, ever take your kid to the State Fair.

(I told you I didn't like the fair....)