Why?
Well. I'll tell you. (Hold on just a second while I get my step stool a little closer to the pulpit. Tap, tap, tap. Is this thing on? Can you hear me? Okay. Good.)
It's because, hello, (spoiler alert) reality is: SHE DOESN'T REALLY DO IT. That's right folks. The regular, run of the mill wife/mother/etc., CANNOT DO IT ALL. (Audience gasps) It's a lie portrayed beautifully through characters like: June Cleaver, Carol Brady, Shirley Partridge, and Claire Huxtable. Great moms? Sure, on paper and film. Real moms? Meeehhhh...not so much.
Real moms spend every single day walking the tightrope of life, falling down, getting up, falling down, getting up, going to bed and then getting back up the next day to do it all over again. Real moms feel the pressure (created by society) to be perfect and daily fight the battle to grasp that ever elusive, ever moving golden ring.
And Mama Bears, we're never going to get it. It just isn't possible.
When I think of the title "I Don't Know How She Does It" I actually think the same thing. Because these are the kinds of things this Mama Bear does:
- Shows up for Sugar Bear's ballet class (not the first one, mind you) at the time the class gets out...not when it starts.
- In the hustle and bustle of back to school hysteria, forgets to plan her youngest cub's birthday party until two weeks before said birthday.
- Ignores the blinking oil light on the car that says "-151%." Because, if the Swagger Wagon didn't spontaneously combust at -135% it will probably survive a few more errands.
- Drops off cub at school wearing her pajamas because getting 5 more minutes of shut-eye beat out vanity.
- Cannot, for all that is good and holy, get her youngest cub to poop in the potty.
- Has a list, but cannot find it.
- Recognizes at, oh, midnight or so that she never got around to brushing her teeth. Or bathing. Or combing her hair.
- Forgets friends' birthdays, anniversaries and other very important life events. Constantly.
- Has her cub study the spelling list all week only to realize at 11 p.m. the night before the test that she gave the cub the wrong spelling list.
- Registers for a mandatory scout training class less than 24 hours before said training class begins.
- Oversleeps and misses her weekly long run with her running group. That she's supposed to help lead.
- Goes a whole evening without recognizing that she has her panties on backwards. (Truth. Very, very uncomfortable truth)
I could go on. But I won't. Because you get the picture. And I don't even have a paying-outside-of-the-den job. (For those of you who do - hats off. You guys rock and are my total heros.)
So, despite my love for SJP, I hope you'll excuse me if I skip this one.
I just can't do it.
Love your list! (at least you'll be able to find this one from now on!!)
ReplyDeleteI had some friends over on Friday night and decided it was a great opportunity to make 4 (!!!) different recipes for dinner. As I kept sending my older cub to watch something else on TV, and left my younger cub in her crib longer than she probably needed to a time or two, I thought to myself, "it's impossible to be both a good mom and a good household manager at any one time...and I'm not even adding a JOB into the equation."
Keep fightin' the good fight, Cousin Bear! You are a fabulous mama!!
Go read my blog today and you'll discover that there is NEED to skip this movie and spend the money on really bonding with other Moms...from all walks of life--the single ones, working ones, stay-at-homers, etc.
ReplyDeleteOne less book to read, too...THANKS!
haha! I have a long list of just toothfairy blunders alone, plus all the other stuff - our toothfairy is awful! She just cannot get it right! Hang in there on the potty issue, Big S had the same prob, took a year to get the poo step done. It is common, not anything you are doing wrong!
ReplyDelete