Memorial Day Robbery

WANTED: Ice Cream Bandit

LAST SEEN: Slowly driving large decorated van, laughing maniacally 

CRIME: Highway Robbery

That's right bear friends.  I hate to ruin your holiday spirit but, I was robbed.

Last night, as we were outside enjoying the last few hours of sunlight, I heard yet another sign of summer.  In the distance, was the tinny sound of "Do Your Ears Hang Low" and moments later, we saw it:  the infamous, "ICE CREAM TRUCK (which is actually a van these days)".  Seeing multiple bear cubs about, this entrepreneurial fellow whipped his van down our merry little lane and parked directly in front of our crowd.

I was immediately transported back to my bear cub days, where we would hear the bells, dash inside to beg a quarter (or, if we were lucky, fifty cents) and then dash back outside in pursuit of a cold afternoon treat.  Ahhhh.  Memories!

Since it was a holiday (plus, I'm a nostalgic sorta bear) I decided to buy the bear cubs a round of...ice cream.  I dashed inside to retrieve my wallet.  When I returned, I thought it was odd that the Ice Cream Truck wasn't moving.  I should have known something was up.  In my day, the Ice Cream Truck only stopped if you were running after it at full speed waving your money wildly.  The bear cubs and I bellied up to the ice cream bar and put in our orders.  

"Two Bubble Gum Snow Cones, please!" I said with delight.  By this time, the bear cubs were giddy with excitement, and I was thrilled to be passing along the time honored Ice Cream Truck Tradition.  

"That'll be $7.50."  

"SEVEN DOLLARS AND FIFTY CENTS?" I cried.

"Yep, $7.50."

There you go, folks.  I was robbed!!!  Three dollars and seventy five cents for one bubble gum flavored snow cone.  

Is anyone else shocked by this?

I ever-so-casually mentioned to the Ice Cream Bandit, "Wow, prices sure have gone up since I was a bear cub. Ha ha ha!"  At which point the Ice Cream Bandit began a monologue that he had clearly done before.  "We only buy quality ice cream!  This is new van!  I used to pay $20 for gas, now I pay $45!!

Sheesh.  

So beware bears.  He's out there somewhere looking for his next victim.  Slowly rolling down your streets, plying you like the Pied Piper with his sweet music and yummy treats.  But do not be fooled.  This man is a THIEF and should be behind bars.  

Until then, I'll make myself feel better by spending this holiday making Brother Bear eat every single last lick of that Snow Cone.